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Saturday, August 20, 2011

I knew this would happen!

I knew it!

Anyone who has had a baby, especially a C-section, knows that it takes a while to heal. But even worse, it takes what feels like forever to get 'yourself' back! My mother has been with me since I had my son and I don't know what I would have done without her! (That's an entire post!...coming soon!) She helps me with the day shift and darling hubby helps with the night shift. So even though I'm still quite tired, I have had tremendous support, and baby Anthony is a prince! Apart from getting big and heavy too fast for comfort, he's really been a good baby.

I've been blessed.

However......................It's taken forever to get back! And I'm not even sure what 'back' is anymore! But let's start with dressing up. Anyone who knows me knows that being well dressed is my number one priority! Whether it's at home or out, I just don't feel right when I'm not well put together. And back at home, having a business at home, it was automatic that once I woke up, I would get dressed for work, I'm just used to it.

Having a baby has turned everything upside down. I've been living in my robe for the past four and a half months! My mother looks at me and her eyes say, "Who are you??? And what have you done with my real daughter????" She's been trying to get me to at least make some clothes suitable for breast feeding but no show! I only get dressed when we're having company or if we have to go out.

BUT!.......

Today, I'm feeling different. I woke up, had a bath, put on a girdle and put on jeans that I haven't worn in over a year with a white shirt. I even put some make up on and did my hair.





What happened?

What changed?

I'll tell you....

I feel better. I'm feeling good about myself. Between Thursday and today (today's Saturday), something has shifted. I'm not feeling lost, I'm not feeling useless, I'm not feeling like just a cow. I'm feeling like a woman, the woman that I am, the one that I've missed. I'm feeling strong, I'm feeling empowered.

And where did all this magic come from? It came from sharing my life, from opening up! And from the responses I have received here, on Facebook and on phone. I feel like I'm part of something again. I feel like I have value again.

I didn't have any set goals when I was signing up for Kelly Rae's Flying lessons. I may have a room full of art, flowers, clothes and other creations. I set up Etsy shops last year and they're all empty. I don't have a plan. I'm still all over the place.

But......!

I knew I was going to get something from Flying Lessons....

And I have! The magic has begun! I feel alive!

I knew it would happen!

And for that, I am truly grateful!

6 comments:

  1. Rebecca from Flying Lessons. So happy to hear that you are finding yourself again after having a baby. Sometimes the best things in life (a baby) can throw us for a loop. Welcome back! You look great! I love the ruffle sleeves!

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  2. Helloooo gorgeous! I am so glad you are BACK! You absolutely give me goosebumps with your electric words. Seriously I can feel your joy all the way over here!!!! Thank you. The world needs you!

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  3. I can feel u r really back! you look fab in the pix! Congrats and thank u for sharing your life with us.

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  4. Glad you are feeling better! It is so nice when we feel so good about ourselves...
    Karen from Flying Lessons

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  5. Wo! I didn't feel like myself until my son was about 2 years old, I think you are doing pretty well. Be kind to yourself-you ARE beautiful! Embrace yourself just the way you are, hooray for you!

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