Pages

Thursday, December 11, 2014

Time For The World To Split Open

"What would happen if one woman told the truth about her life? The world would split open."
Muriel Rukeyser

Today I cried.

I didn't cry because my son fell and gashed his forehead yesterday.....which led to an entire night at the ER waiting for a 15 minute treatment.
I didn't cry because I have finals this week and I can't seem to pull myself together to do my exams.
I didn't cry because I'm exhausted.
I didn't cry because I'm lonely.

I cried because I watched a fashion show. Yes, a fashion show. A Valentino Couture show in New York celebrating the opening of a giant store on 5th Avenue.

I cried my eyes and my heart out.

Why was I crying?

Was it because of the clothes? The designs?

No. They were beautiful though. But they didn't make me cry.

I cried because I wasn't there with them. I wasn't sitting in the front row.

I cried because I wasn't one of the 'beautiful people'.

I cried because my American Dream hasn't come true.

I cried because I'm bored.

I cried because I don't like my life.

I cried because I'm not myself.

So judge me if you like.....heaven only knows.....I'm judging myself as I type.

But I just want to tell the truth.

Did the world split open? I'm going outside to look.