Let's Make believe......New York Fashion Week

Hello Lovelies,

I went away! But I'm back! As you know I'm in school, and so weekends and Mondays are going to be my off days from blogging so that I can catch up with school work while the husband is home taking care of our son! I hope you don't miss me too much! (....and today, I'm posting twice to make up for yesterday.......)

It's currently Fashion Week in Milan, we're done with New York and London. As part of school work, we have to critique the designers who appeal to our personal aesthetic the most. This semester, I'm being asked to move out of my 'comfort zone' and explore younger, edgier and more contemporary and adventurous designers. Well, I'm there to learn right? And so I will, however, my aesthetic will never change. I believe in women looking beautiful, looking like ladies, looking sexy and looking powerful. And as women look this way, they will feel this way too! So you're never going to see any crazy, innovative, terribly avant garde (you'll see a little avant gardism......) and space like creations here. Nope. It's not my style.

As a Designer and Life Artist, I just want us all to have fun! I have to be honest, right now, my life is not as glamorous as I would like it to be. I'm a full time Suburban Mom! My days are filled with chasing my son around the house, playing with food and covering myself in the process, Dora the Explorer (he has a big crush!) and picking after him as he destroys our home, in an attempt to keep some sense of design and order alive! However, it's a choice I made and I am so grateful to be able to enjoy every single moment of his childhood. I wouldn't have it any other way! But.........! I do miss the other side of life, the Glam life, getting dressed to the nines, lunches, shopping, dinners, hanging with the girls and all the good stuff! I know that time will come again, but for now, I can make believe!

Let's have some fun!

Before we begin, I just wanted to bring your awareness to a fact. We're all different. We all have different body types. The Fashion Industry uses slim tall models as a way of keeping everything consistent. They have actually been called 'human coat hangers'......and I don't subscribe to the term, but it just makes my point. It takes a little bit of imagination to see yourself in these clothes when you don't look like the models. But please indulge me and try. Pretty Please.

The example of Jennifer Lopez vs the model may not be the most inspiring, but it confirms what I'm trying to say. Looking at the model, even for me, the last thing on my mind would have been the fact that this is a really sexy red skirt! So you see, stretching the imagination helps. See yourself in the clothes with no preconceptions. Just have fun!

 

Donna Karan is my current favorite designer. Now that I'm a mother and my body has changed, I've come to appreciate her design aesthetic. She really truly is a woman designing for women. I'll dedicate a whole post to her tomorrow, to tell you all the other reasons why she inspires me so! Today, it's about make believe!

 I LOVE the Rose Pink! This could be for work or for play, from daytime to evening! Totally feminine, which I love. The options are endless! Above all, it looks comfortable, modern (the shapes are what make it modern), sexy in a subtle way (which I love....again!) and still stylish! And the fabric! It feels so organic and yet, the texture makes you know it's luxurious!

 I would love to spend the day chasing my son around in this! But add heels and some serious jewelry and I could hit the city lights, have a great dinner (!!!!) and still feel 'high fashion'! Again, the fabric! It feels like liquid!

 I feel like going for a Summer lunch or a picnic in this one. I could also wear this to work and feel very feminine and relaxed, but still well put together!

 This one looks so perfect for hiding my stomach right now! Just take a close look at the construction, fitting the high waist and flaring out structurally towards the abdomen! Genius! Another versatile look, could be dressed 'up' with heels and killer accessories, or 'down' with flats and a pony tail.

 Here's one of the more adventurous ones and I'm not going to discriminate! I love the bottom part! This would be perfect for a slimmer body type and the volume of the skirt adds the drama! Again, could be dressed up or dressed down.

 Now, please don't panic! Remember, these are called 'Fashion Shows' for a reason. It's a 'show'! But in the real world, this would be lined or there would be an extra garment to wear under, leaving the option open for the wild ones......that's the beauty of fashion! In the meantime, take a close look at the deconstructionist details! You can only imagine the amount of craftsmanship that goes into creating these effects!

 One of my favorites. I feels so easy and light! To go grocery shopping with flats or a great party in heels! And still feel comfortable and sexy!

 This is what I was talking about in reference to the design before the last one. This one has been lined creating a different look all together! Another easy look. Could be casual of could be for work.

 One o the 'proper' looks which I love! With pearls, kitten heels and a pony tail, you would be the ultimate 'Classic' lady! With killer heels, chunky jewelry and wild hair, you could be super sexy and yet ladylike glam! It's all up to you!

 Oh how I love this one! It looks comfortable and at the same time, super glam and tres chic! This would be my Springtime staple coat! I could wear it with jeans and a crisp white shirt, or for the evening with a long black dress, a chignon and black gloves! I love it!

 This is the new 'corporate look'! Feminine and powerful all in one! LOVE!

 Heart be still! Look at the fabric! Look at the colors! The Artist in me wants to create a painting right now! This is what I call a wearable work of art! The draping, easy and yet molding the body where it's necessary! I could splurge on this (we know it won't be cheap!) and it could be my Spring Summer 2013 uniform! I would wear it everyday! With flats! Or......for the evening......with flat ironed hair or wild curls and either with a very 'ethnic' and bold  necklace, or bangles to fill both arms, not both! It would be divine!

 Did I just talk about a uniform! This would be it! Sculpted and very well designed, and yet easy! That's Donna Karan! I could wear this anywhere! With my favorite coat, a few designs above, or as is, with a little or a LOT of jewelry!

 Another easy dress. Could be formal or casual. Could be for work or could be for play! Again, with lots of jewelry and heels.....effortless glam!

 Another feminine work ensemble. And after hours, take off the jacket pile on some accessories and it's sexy and ladylike high fashion.

 I died and went to heaven when I saw this! The softness, the layers, the textures, the asymmetry......I could write a whole essay! I'm so in love with this dress! I want it now! Like right now!

 This is the classic 'Shift' dress a la Donna Karan! With a bold necklace and heels, another perfect 'from day to night' dress! And again, observe the construction, touching the body where we want to be touched and skimming over where we don't want to be seen!

 Modern Contemporary Feminine Power Suit. Period.

 The classic wrap dress, but just feel the fabric with your eyes! It's sexy and yet elegant and actually very formal. Perfect dress for work and perfect dress for play! And the color!!!!

The Grand Finale. I think this is the one I want. I can't say how much I love this dress and how it would make me feel! Like I could float!

Aaaaaaaah......I've had my 'fix' for the day, I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did! There's a LOT more of this coming!

See you very soon!

I Have A New Uniform! And I LOVE It!!!!

As you can see, I've been blogging consistently for 4 days in a row! And I think this time, it'll last!

I think I'm going to be able to stick with it this time because I have a new daily routine which I've been able to maintain for over a month now. As you may know or not know, I'm a happy, proud, sometimes overwhelmed mother of a 19 month old adorable ball of energy! And I'm a Wife. I'm also a full time student, studying for my MFA in Fashion Design (online) aaaaand, I'm an Artist, Designer, Writer, and Entrepreneur in Transition......!

So, 24 hours are not enough!!!!!! But, I've found a way to make it work, thanks to my wonderful business mentor Marianne Emma Jeff. I'll tell you all about her one day soon!

I started out by waking up at 5 am every morning. I would come downstairs and just sit, get on Facebook and simply force myself to wake up. After a couple of days, as my body started adjusting, I would wake up, and plan to do something, so I started painting. Something to look forward to. Then I moved from 5 to 4. Obviously, I had to start sleeping earlier. We all had to!

Now, thanks to the Power of Sensuality (I know, I'll tell you soon! I promise!), my routine is spectacular! I'm so inspired, and I also started school last week.

Now, I wake up at 3am, I have a nice long shower and I actually get dressed up! It gives me more energy than anything else that has been part of this new routine! I get dressed up, make up, jewelry and all and I come downstairs. I spend a few minutes in silence, just being still, being thankful and meditating upon the goodness of life and a new day.  I also have a glass of warm water and lemon. Then I get to work.

It's the dressing up part which has been the kicker! I haven't been inspired to dress up in a long time, childbirth simply confused my system, and I'm still nursing so nothing really works, but just being able to have my 'me' time, all dressed up, and then changing to get back into mommy mode has done a lot for my self esteem! But today! I have found something that I can use to combine all these parts of my life!

I'm so excited!

My mother will tell you that I believe I was an Indian princess in my past life! I also believe I was the Queen of Sheba......but that's another story for another day! We (Moiselle and I) had been discussing Indian Sarees a while ago. I think what sparked that conversation was Oprah's visit to India, in one of her fittings the designer told her that she had a "Saree body"!

I know this isn't a Saree but it's beautiful!!!! I had to add it!

Well, I think I have a Saree body too! Every woman has a Saree body! I think Indian women are so beautiful and so sensual! And they are able to exude all this sensuality and sexiness with decency! It's the most beautiful thing the eyes can behold!

This morning, as I was getting dressed up, the thought crossed my mind. I have one Saree but it is heavily embroidered and beaded, not even something I can pull of at 3 in the morning! I had watched videos about how to wear Sarees before, and basically, all I needed was about 6 yards of fabric. Being the fabric addict that I am, that was not a problem at all! So I pulled out some black chiffon from my stash, wore a black strapless top, and Voila!

It's simple plain chiffon, but it's beautiful!!!!

I can't tell you how beautiful I feel! And the best part! I won't have to change into my 'mom' clothes because I can still nurse my son easily in this!!!!

I am so so happy!

And I just had to share! I've even been brave enough to take a picture too!

I hope you will be inspired!

Some more lovelies to look at! Enjoy!

See you tomorrow!

Intimacy

Intimacy: A close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person or group.

Today, I've been going down memory lane. And it's memory lane which has inspired my post today.

I'm going through a life transforming experience and it's called The Power of Sensuality. I don't mean to tease you, but right now it's sacred so I can't spill all the beans......but, what I can tell you is that I've been forever transformed and I will be a better Woman, Mother, Wife, Friend, Artist, Writer, Designer, Business Woman and Mentor after this experience. So, stay tuned.......In the meantime, The Power of Sensuality is nudging me towards more Intimacy in all areas of my life, hence a trip down memory lane.

Today, my trip down memory lane took me to a very special woman named Gabi.

Gabi is a very special friend of mine.  She's German and at the time, she lived in Accra (she's moved back to Germany now). She owned a Spa that I used to go to back at home in Ghana. It was in the 'back house', like a tiny guest house at the back of her house. No more than a total of 300 square feet. I used to call Gabi's Spa my healing place. Even though I worked at home and had most of the 'services' I needed brought to me at home; massages, manicures, pedicures, hair dressing........all in the comfort of my own little boudoir, I would save money and drive through traffic, one and a half to two hours to Gabi's place. And these escapades were usually with my BFF Moiselle. (Another former BFF, "My Exotic Orchid", introduced me to Gabi, and that's a story for another day!)

Upon arriving at this tiny space, the scent of sweet candles is what would greet us. Along with that came a glass of wine and if it was a special occasion, Champagne, to get us in the mood. Gabi took care of facials, foot and hand treatments herself and she usually hired a masseuse (the best in town!!!!) to give us our massages. It was a small space, two beds in different corners of the room, a wooden soaker tub and a shower. Two armchairs and a shelf of books, CDs and products, that was it. Candle light was usually the only lighting....dark, and warm.

It was Intimate.

A facial with Gabi was a heavenly experience. She had the softest hands and her products were divine. But above all was the person herself. During a facial, we would talk, really really talk. We had deep conversations which would simply start with "how are you doing?', and just like that, I would open up and tell her what was going on in my life. Major decisions were made on Gabi's facial bed. The confidence to get married in a very complicated situation, she gave me the strength and fanned my faith. The decision to leave everything I had ever known and move to the USA to be with my husband and start a new life. Two of the biggest decisions of my life, made with Gabi's kindness, compassion and wisdom.

If I was alone, it would be a facial first and then a massage. If I was with Moiselle, we would take turns in any order we felt like. After our massages, we would fall asleep like little babies. And then after the massage came a long soak in the wooden tub, Champagne or wine on a table nearby with again, the sweetest smelling products. And then a shower. Sometimes, we would add a foot and hand treatment, and to have Gabi's soft hands taking care of you.....words cannot describe the feeling.

Again, Intimacy.

Once we were done with all the good stuff, we would dress up, no make up and then be ushered into her home. She had such a beautiful home, a truly beautiful and warm home. It was time to eat, it was a feast! In the most beautiful settings! And it wasn't like a service that was being provided, it was like having lunch or dinner at your best friend's house, sometimes there would be extra guests, and sometimes it would be just us.

I miss those times with all my heart! I miss Gabi so so much!

But above all, my experiences with Gabi have inspired me! Inspired me and remind me on a daily basis that as I create this next chapter of my life, the word 'Intimacy' is going to be one of my guiding principles. In my next phase, it is my strong desire to bring Intimacy to everything that I offer. Sometimes, when I'm not in tune with my deepest self, I scratch my head and I wonder, how am I going to bring Intimacy into a painting, into a design, into a service I provide. But my higher self knows better and I know that I  just need to get still, put all fear and judgement out of the way, and I will be shown the way.

I have to say, after my experiences with Gabi, the bar has been raised to impossible heights! No one has come close. When I drag myself to get a pedicure or something at one of those places....you know what I mean, it's such a lifeless mechanical experience, but, the million dollar question is....Isn't that what life has become?

 I'm putting my Economist hat on here......but I believe this is what is wrong with the world. Especially in women's services. Everything is being robotized and systemized, and yes, it's efficient, but it's not for our highest good. The economists talk about certain jobs which are gone and will never come back. I agree. But I also believe that anyone who creates a business or provides a service and brings a certain level of Intimacy into the service will never go without work. The human experience is based on Intimacy. I am a woman and I KNOW that women are yearning for Intimacy, for compassion and for kindness in these very challenging times......ok, my hat comes off here.

So, I hope you enjoyed this little trip down memory lane, there will be more to come. Above all, I hope you've been inspired to bring some Intimacy into your life. (And I know this wasn't what you were expecting when you read the title!)

I also aspire to bring Intimacy into my writing here on my blog.

And of course, I couldn't leave without some images to inspire Intimacy in your life today. As you may know, or not know, I love flowers, and I always say, if flowers were a language, they would be the only language I would speak!

Here are some stunning images form Joyce Tenneson and her book of amazing Intimate images of flowers.

Enjoy!

A Demain!

Augustin Kassi.....Beauty Lies In The Hands Of He Who Is Willing To See.....

Yesterday, I stumbled across an article about an artist who created paintings of 'Big and Beautiful' African women. His name is Augustin Kassi and he lives in La Cote d'Ivoire, West Africa, right across the border from where I am from, Ghana. I actually shared the article and posted on my FB page. I think I want to talk about this some more. I want to discuss the topic honestly and from a place of authenticity.

I have never been slim. At my smallest, I was an American size 8/10 and this was after I had moved to California, had become obsessed with fitting into the smaller sizes that all my favorite designers made clothes in and also had become inspired by the healthy Californian lifestyle, and especially the influence of Yoga, which I love! So, before I became pregnant with my son, I was almost at my target size, which was a 6. I've never had the desire to be a size Zero..........

But then, I became pregnant, gained weight and I have not been able to lose all the 'baby fat'. To make it worse for me personally, I've always prided myself in having quite a flat stomach and a small waist, in proportion to my hips, I had never really been too worried about my weight (even though I know I've been 'dieting' all my adult life!). But post pregnancy, I've lost that. I've lost my center. And that is what causes me the most angst. Not only does that make me feel insecure about my body, but I even feel like I can't walk straight and stand tall because of my weakened stomach muscles.

It's been quite agonizing.

I have many many thoughts around the subject, which I will continue to share, but today, I would like to focus on the artist, Augustin Kassi.

He says he was inspired to start painting the 'Big and Beautiful' women after he witnessed a woman being asked to pay double on a bus ride because of her size. I think he's a Prince!

So, here's the million dollar question.

Who and what is Beautiful? And who determines that?

Yes, we say Africa has been bombarded with the influence of Western culture, I get that, but come over to the West and the women here are suffering even more than the ones in Africa!

From my 'fashion' point of view, in Africa, we have our 'cloth' and you can at least have something tailor made for you in whatever size you are, but shopping for clothes for the Plus size woman here is the most depressing experience! I have to say!

Again, let me not get lost here. Today, I would simply like to honor this Prince, this man who is standing up for Big and beautiful African women. As an African woman, an Artist, a Feminist and a Fashion Designer, I am truly inspired by him. He has taken a 'subject' who is particularly looked down upon and he's created something beautiful.

I really hope we all find something to be inspired by and something to learn from Augustin Kassi.

Definitely more to come on the subject!

For now, enjoy!

See you!

Redefined

"I don't mind living in a man's world as long as I can be a woman in it."

Marilyn Monroe




I've been 'wanting' to blog again for months, but I just couldn't. I haven't been inspired.

Why?

I was talking to a dear friend a couple of weeks ago, she also has a blog which hasn't been as active as she would like. I told her that I simply wasn't inspired to write about one thing when I was feeling another. She said she felt the same way! In that moment, I felt validated and I started wondering. What if I really wrote what was on my mind? After all I am a writer! (Thanks to Danielle LaPorte who is my current faraway super mentor! I'm reading FireStarter Sessions and Style Statements right now. Recently, she said something that got me thinking.....she said what you call yourself matters! And so, yes, I am a Writer. You can find the article here)

So, what am I feeling?

Motherhood has been the greatest blessing of my life. My son is my world! I cannot imagine how my life could have ever been worthwhile without him. He IS my life! And I thank God everyday!

However............motherhood has turned me upside down and inside out! It's turned me into a psycho on some days, a bag full of out of control emotions on other days. It's made me question so many aspects of my life and bottom line, I'm exhausted.

But this is not to whine about motherhood. No. It's about seeking to find a better way to BE. An easier way to live this life which is now my own.

Lately, I've been drawn to Femininity and The Feminist Movement. In some strange way, I feel like I have to fight with myself (not men) to be a woman. There's this internal struggle and I think it's basically my true authentic self fighting to be acknowledged.

Who, dare I ask is this Authentic Self? The true feminine. The soft feminine. The state in which I probably was (let's say before age 5) before the world started dictating who I was to be and how I was to live.

I'm on this journey to reclaim The Feminine.

And now, I feel like writing. And like blogging.

So am I going to stop posting about Fashion, Style, Design, Lifestyle etc.....? NO! Now that I've laid this added foundation, it gives me the perfect and most authentic feeling container to express myself in a manner that feels true to who I am and who I aspire to be.

Let's do this!

Of course, I couldn't leave without a little eye candy, could I?

.

Here's a video which also inspired me, I would like to share it with you too! It was actually a wedding present from someone to his wife. The messages are very inspiring!

See you tomorrow!

Happy New Year!

It's January 23rd and to be very honest, I'm NOW feeling like I'm in the New Year!

And so, Happy New Year!

There's this poem that I've always tried to begin my year with, I've posted it on Facebook a couple of times, but this year, I'll share it here.

Now is the dawn of a New Year

A New Year stands before me

Like a mighty beautiful oak

Now is a new opportunity

To do what I've always wanted to do

To become what I've always dreamed of becoming

Now is a new life

A life filled with love and pride

Now is the time to choose my way

As a being who has traveled far

To find a port, to weigh anchor

Now is the beginning of a wonderful adventure

Now I am ready to embrace the year ahead!

Author unknown

This year more than ever, this poem expresses how I really feel! This is my first New Year as a mother and even though I'm exhausted and it's part of the reason why I'm now feeling the 'newness' of the year, it's also much more than that. This year, it's not just about me and my dreams and aspirations. I have a precious new permanent member of my life, and the combination of thoughts, feelings and emotions has been much more than I can usually handle at the beginning of another year. The beginning of another chance to get it 'right', whatever right is.....?

After fighting all the emotions, thoughts and 'permanent change of plans', I have found peace in one word; Surrender.

And it is surrender which has given me the strength to come back to my blog and try again. Surrender which is allowing me to alter my so called plans and re create the life that I had imagined. Surrender which makes me believe that I never had any power anyway, even though I thought I did, and I might as well surrender to that which is bigger than me.

All over the internet and especially in my 'Fly Tribe' we've all been selecting a word for the year. I've never been known to be one to focus on one thing and I'm not even going to try now......

My first word is "Surrender", and I've explained my reason for this choice above. I'm too tired, too overwhelmed, too emotional, too scared to feel like I can do it 'alone' and so, I have raised my hands to the Universe in total surrender and I know she'll take it from there.

But that's not all. 

Last year, my dear friend Cindy gave me this piece of precious art, she gave me her word, 'Emerge', and I made it my word......exciting times!

But the truth is, I still haven't emerged.......

I haven't become manifest, I haven't become known 

I haven't  risen from an enveloping fluid,  I haven't come out into view 

I haven't risen from an obscure or inferior position or condition 

And I haven't come into being through evolution .....it's an ongoing process......

And so, from a place of ultimate humility and surrender, I continue to find myself, I continue to find my strength and my voice and I continue to find my way out of the darkness to emerge.

Now, In the spirit of 'Emerging', I have yet another layer to add to my 'words' for 2012.

Last year, on a mundane, routine grocery shopping trip, I decided to buy an Amaryllis. In shame, I confess, it's the first flower I've planted upon coming to California, of course I get cut flowers all the time, but this is the first one I was making a 'commitment' to. And so I planted her and put her next to the kitchen sink....in my little garden of dying plants....with the hope that she would bring us all life!

She did! I watered her when I could, I think I even over watered her, thank goodness she's a Lily, and lilies love water. Finally, I was rewarded! She actually rewarded me around the New Year. But here's the juicy part....she EMERGED! She emerged from the darkness into the light because of the little watering on my part and of course thanks to a force, a power greater than I could ever be!

It's interesting how having a child has made me observe the world in new eyes....I don't know if it's the extreme exhaustion or am I truly becoming more intelligent or more aware of the mystery of life......?

Anyway, in my state of utter joy, I decided to look up the symbolism of the Amaryllis, and what I found was so cool!

"The word "amaryllis" comes from the Greek word "amaryssein," which means "to sparkle," referring to the bloom. Today, the amaryllis symbolizes pride, determination and radiant beauty--the kind that emanates from an inner source and flowers outward."

So you see, as usual, after my long winded road, it's all coming together!

As I SURRENDER, and as I continue with PRIDE and DETERMINATION to forge on, nurturing my inner flower, watering her and caring for her the best way I know how, in due season, I will EMERGE from the soil, the darkness and uncertainty that is my life into the light as a radiant RADIANT, BEAUTIFUL flower, SPARKLING like the stars for the whole world to see!

So, I won't give up. I'll keep on dreaming, keep on trying, when I fall, I'll surrender, get up and try again.....and who knows? Among other things, maybe I'll be able to blog consistently this year..........

HAPPY NEW YEAR!